Well today was the first Christmas with my grandmother being gone. It ended up better than the "family" party on Sunday. That was just too quiet and annoying. I cooked the dinner and tried to keep my dad as occupied as possible. He seemed pretty good, didn't leave right after we ate. I was afraid he would.
Parts of me wants to just get back home to see my husband and dogs. The other parts makes me feel like i need to stay here and make sure my dad is okay. He lost his oldest brother and mother this summer. I've lost a lot too, but I think I'm more resilient then he is right now. He was already lonely. And now the two people he talked to most we're gone. I'm glad Brian agreed to do Christmas dinner at his place. I didn't want my dad to be in a damn diner for Christmas,
He might be having a stent Put In his leg on 3 Jan. I'm worried it's more serious then he makes it or then he thinks it is. I don't know about stents to feel comfortable with it. The way this year has gone year has been doesn't make me feel any better about it.
I saw that hoe Nicole today. I haven't seen her in person since maybe high school. I wasn't sure it was her. Looking fat and ugly with her pajama pants on. Then I saw one white kid and one black kid and I knew it was her. I just gave her my look like "I'll kill you bitch" and kept going. It was Christmas and she was with her kids. I didn't want to be stupid. I really did want to tell her " if you speak to my husband one more time, I will burn your house down." But I don't want to be violent or crazy. But she needs to fuck with men that aren't married.
That's it for now. I'm tired and there isn't much on t.v.
Me
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